Tomorrow will be four years since my sweet Olivia took her last breath. March 23rd will always be a date that will burn in my brain.
Five years ago, March 23rd meant nothing. It was just an ordinary day. I probably went to work and Olivia went to her second grade classroom.
Today, March 23rd churns up terrible memories. It's a day that changes the lives of so many people. Not only me, Erick, and Ainsley have been traumatized my the death of Olivia but so have my Uncle and my cousin and my dad who were all of the boat with me and Olivia that dreadful day.
March 23, 2012 will be an anniversary of such profound sadness.
What I find myself thinking of is that it's been four years ago that I had a hug, a kiss, a "mommy, guess what?' from that sweet little girl of mine. It's been four years since we've heard her sweet voice and laughter. Four years since she played in the backyard with her baby sister. Four years ago since we said our bedtime prayers.
Next year will be five years, then six, and then seven. I don't even want to think about how this will feel ten years from now.
How I long for those days back.
The problem with March 23rd is that it's inevitable. I can't keep it from coming but I can make it something different. tomorrow, we will gather with our close friends have have a lantern launch sending our love up to Olivia.
We'll light the sky just like she lit up our hearts.