But this time it's so very different.
Looking through that closet only made me remember specific times and milestones ~ The sweater that she wore for her third grade school picture. The dress that she wore for a Christmas party with her Grandma Donna. The Mickey Mouse t-shirt that we had to buy her on an unexpectedly chilly evening in Disney World. The shirt she wore on the first day of third grade. They were all still hanging there.
(First day of third grade)
Incorporating all of those "memory clothes" into Ainsley' side of the closet means that there are no more wardrobes to pass down to Ainsley.
It's like a double edged sword. That side of the closet where Olivia's clothes are hanging would be bare. Yet, seeing those clothes is a constant reminder that she's no longer with us. Yet, removing them, letting Ainsley wear them this year means that I have no more clothes to look at and provide me those moments in time with Olivia.
I grabbed a couple of shirts that I thought weren't too outdated, including the Mickey Mouse shirt and the purple peasant top that she wore on the first day of third grade, washed them (man they were dusty) and will hang them up on Ainsley's side of the closet. However the others will remain, tucked on the right hand side of the closet because I don't want to forget what her final wardrobe looked like at this time.